Stupid Quotes of 2015

Quote of the Year: ''You could see there was blood coming out of her eyes. Blood coming out of her wherever."
-Donald Trump on Megyn Kelly

Quote of the Year (Runner Up): "I don't think they're gaining strength. What is true, from the start our goal has been first to contain and we have contained them."
-Barack Obama one day before the Paris attacks

Typo of the Year: …”she’s fought children and families all her career.”
-Hillary Clinton presidential announcement

And the rest:
"We were taught snipers were cowards. Will shoot u in the back. Snipers aren't heroes. "
-Michael Moore

"You have to be careful about drinking around me."
-Bill Cosby

“Because Michael, face it -- the guy was basically average in terms of size, strength, speed, jumping ability, all the things that you seem to think make a great player.”
-Bill Walton on Michael Jordan

"Unless we get on our high horse and think this is unique to some other place,
remember that during the Crusades and the Inquisition, people committed terrible
deeds in the name of Christ."
-Barack Obama at the 2015-national-prayer-breakfast

"Well, watch out, you know that Michelle Obama looks like she's from the cast of 'Planet of the Apes,' the movie."
-Rodner Figueroa

"Members deserve to be paid, staff deserves to be paid and the cost of living here is causing serious problems for people who are not wealthy to serve in this institution."
-Rep. Alcee Hastings

"When Mexico sends its people, they're not sending the best ... they're sending
people that have lots of problems and they're bringing those problems. They're
bringing drugs, they're bringing crime. They're rapists and some, I assume, are
good people, but I speak to border guards and they're telling us what we're
getting,"
-Donald Trump

“If you are a white man in America, this country is changing dramatically. You have always been in charge. So there is something to white men feeling like something has been taken away from them.”
-Annonymous White House Official quoted in Washington Post
"I identify with black."
-Rachel Dolezal

"It was very courageous and brave, if not crazy as well, to open fire on the police headquarters.”
-Fredericka Whitfield on the attack on Dallas Police HQ
"I like people that weren't captured."
-Donald Trump

"Everybody thought Hillary Clinton was unbeatable, right? But we put together a Benghazi special committee, a select committee. What are her numbers today? Her numbers are dropping. Why? Because she's untrustable. But no one would have known any of that had happened had we not fought."
-Kevin McCarthy

“If only there was a ‘coon of the year’ award."
-Professor Anthea Butler on Ben Carson

There's something different about what happened from Charlie Hebdo, and I think everybody would feel that. There was a sort of particularized focus and perhaps even a legitimacy in terms of -- not a legitimacy, but a rationale that you could attach yourself to somehow and say, okay, they're really angry because of this and that. This Friday was absolutely indiscriminate. It wasn't to aggrieve one particular sense of wrong. It was to terrorize people."
-John Kerry

"I have to call a murder a murder and I have to call the murderers the murderers.”
-Quentin Tarantino on police officers

“The terrible events in Paris were obviously a terrible and sickening setback.”
-Barack Obama

Sports Quotes of the Year: 2015

Quote of the Year: "Just give me two hours, and you're going to have 50, 60, 70 years of memories. Two hours, can you sacrifice, and reach down and give me two hours, so that you can have a lifetime of memories for you, your family, your kids and your kids' kids? That's the memories I'm talking about!"
-Tom Izzo

Quote of the Year (runner up): "A Cespedis for the rest of us"?
-Jerry Seinfeld

And the rest...
“Because Michael, face it -- the guy was basically average in terms of size, strength, speed, jumping ability, all the things that you seem to think make a great player.”
-Bill Walton on Michael Jordan

 “Don’t cry.”
-Rhonda Rousey to Bethe Correia after knocking her out

"Our goal was to come in here and make the 'Red Rifle' look like a Red Ryder BB gun, and I think we did that.”
-JJ Watt on Andy Dalton

"My heart can take the pounding, my mind can handle the grind, but my body knows it's time to say goodbye."
-Kobe Bryant

"In short, Mr. Rose has not presented credible evidence of a reconfigured life either by an honest acceptance by him of his wrongdoing, so clearly established by the Dowd Report, or by a rigorous, self-aware and sustained program of avoidance by him of all the circumstances that led to his permanent ineligibility in 1989. Absent such credible evidence, allowing him to work in the game presents an unacceptable risk of a future violation by him of Rule 21, and thus to the integrity of our sport. I, therefore, must reject Mr. Rose's application for reinstatement."
 -Rob Manfred

Quotes of the Month: February 2015

Quote of the Month: "A life is like a garden. Perfect moments can be had, but not preserved, except in memory. LLAP"


-Leonard Nimoy

Stupid Quote of the Month:
"Because Michael, face it -- the guy was basically average in terms of size, strength, speed, jumping ability, all the things that you seem to think make a great player."


-Bill Walton on Michael Jordan


Dueling Confusion of the Month:
"When the final accounting is done, 2014 will have been the most lethal year for global terrorism in the 45 years such data has been compiled."


- Director of National Intelligence James Clapper
"Despite ISIL, despite the visible killings that you see and how horrific they are, we are actually living in a period of less daily threat to Americans and to people in the world than normally; less deaths, less violent deaths today, than through the last century."


-John Kerry
　


and the rest...
"Unless we get on our high horse and think this is unique to some other place,

remember that during the Crusades and the Inquisition, people committed terrible

deeds in the name of Christ."


-Barack Obama at the 2015-national-prayer-breakfast
"The only problem we’re going to have is running out of fuel and bullets."


-King Abdullah
"In attempting to reduce the importance of one great talent over another, you make a mockery of all musicians and music from every genre, including your own."


-Shirley Manson to Kanye West
"They were killed simply for the fact they were Christians."


-Pope Francis I
"I am my own man."


-Jeb Bush
"No religion is responsible for terrorism, people are responsible for violence and terrorism."

-Barack Obama

"I do not believe, and I know this is a horrible thing to say, but I do not believe that the president loves America."


-Rudy Giuliani
"If we looked around the world and say long-term we cannot kill every terrorist around the world nor should we try, how do you get at the root causes of this? Look, it might be too nuanced of an argument for some like I’ve seen over the past 24 hours some of the commentary out but it’s really the smart way for Democrats, for Republicans, military commanders, our partners in the Arab world think we need to combat it."


-Marie Harf

Quotes of the Month: May 2014

Quote of the Month: "I, myself, deeply regret what happened between me and President Clinton. Let me say it again: I. Myself. Deeply. Regret. What. Happened."


-Monica Lewinsky
Stupid Quote of the Month: "i guess there are some out there who dont like to think that a holocaust survivor had a leg up over a black/brown person due to skin color."


-Oliver Willis
"Basically, I was against all white people."


-Michael Jordan on growing up
"Thirty days in the hospital? And when she reappears, she's wearing glasses that are only for people who have traumatic brain injury? We need to know what's up with that."


-Karl Rove on Hillary Clinton
"What has he done, big Magic Johnson, what has he done?" -


-Donald Sterling
"We must lead."


-Chris Christie on American foreign policy
"I will not stand for it."


-Barack Obama on the VA Scandal
"If there’s ever been evidence that a government-run system of health care is a disaster, it’s here. It’s rationing. It’s waitlists and corruption and laziness, as you get when people are salaried rather than working in the free market."

–Charles Krauthammer on the VA


"I mean, is that how we're now setting the strategy of the United States of America in a war zone, where so many have died and so much treasure and blood has been spent, so a president can leave office looking good?"


-Charles Krauthammer
"It is absolutely true that in the 21st century, American isolationism is not an option."


-Barack Obama

Sports Quotes of the Year: 2013

Quote of the Year: “This is our [expletive] city, and nobody is going to dictate our freedom. Stay strong.”

-Boston Red Sox player David Ortiz after the terror attack on the Boston Marathon

Slam of the Year: “Proud of my husband and the Pats. By the way, if anyone is bored, please go to Ray Lewis’ Wikipedia page. 6 kids 4 wives. Acquitted for murder. Paid a family off. Yay. What a hall of fame player! A true role model!”

-ANNA BURNS WELKER

“This will be my last ride.”

-Ray Lewis announcing his retirement

"If you had to pick between the two, that would be a tough choice, but five beats one every time I look at it."

-Michael Jordan on the question of LeBron vs Kobe

 “I’m a 34-year-old NBA center. I’m black. And I’m gay.”

-JASON COLLINS

"I don’t usually worry about someone’s personal hygiene."

 -Jim Leyland

"I picked the wrong vice. I should have picked alcohol. I should have picked drugs or I should have picked up beating up my wife or girlfriend because if you do those three, you get a second chance."

-PETE ROSE

"Bud Selig is trying to alter his legacy from the commissioner who tacitly condoned steroids to the one who tried to stamp them out."

-Bob Wojonowski Detroit News

"The only thing the HOF will let me in for is to use the restroom."

-Todd Jones

"He [Jay Z] got him a big raise, but he got him an extra 30-day vacation -- and it’s called October."

-Pete Rose on Robinson Cano

 

Quotes of the Month: February 2013

Quote of the Month: “I snorted half of Peru.”

-Steven Tyler

Stupid Quote of the Month: “When was the last time you heard about a rape on campus?”

-Bob Beckel

“I was a jerk.”

-John Mayer

"Death panels and sales taxes is how we do this"

Paul Krugman

"Strength of mind and body are necessary, strength which in the last few months has deteriorated in me to the extent that I have had to recognize my incapacity to adequately fulfill the ministry entrusted to me.”

-Pope Benedict XVI

“It’s like Django unchained! It’s exciting!”

-Marc Lamont Hill on spree killer Christopher Dorner

"If you had to pick between the two, that would be a tough choice, but five beats one every time I look at it."

-Michael Jordan on the question of LeBron vs Kobe

"These cuts are not smart. They are not fair. They will hurt our economy. They will add hundreds of thousands of Americans to the unemployment rolls. This is not an abstraction -- people will lose their jobs."

-Barack Obama

“If he wants to leave it alone and not deal with those two biggies, forget the rest of the stuff -- he'll have a failed presidency."

-Alan Simpson on Obama and the debt

'In America, you have a right to be stupid, if you want to be... and we tolerate that.'

-John Kerry

"That’s a kind of madness that I haven't seen in a long time.”

-Bob Woodward on Obama’s refusal to defend America

"The White House threatened me."

-Bob Woodward

"Congressman, you are a total waste of time. We're moving on, because our audience deserves better."

-Sean Hannity

All Time NBA Team

G- Magic Johnson
G- Michael Jordan
C- Kareem Abdul-Jabbar
F- Larry Bird
F- Julius Erving

C- Bill Russell, Shaquille O’Neal, Wilt Chamberlain

G- Oscar Robertson, Jerry West, Bob Cousy, Isiah Thomas, Dave Bing, Kobe Bryant

F- Tim Duncan, John Havelcek, Bob Petite, Willis Reed, George Mikan, James Worthy

Coach: Red Auerbach

NBA's Greatest Games by Decade

1940s: Philadelphia Warriors: 83 Chicago Stags: 80 (April 22, 1947) BAA Championship: The first pro basketball championship series. Warriors won Game 5 by a score of 83-80 to win the series.


1950s: Fort Wayne Pistons:19 Minneapolis Lakers: 18 (November 22, 1950): This was the lowest scoring game in NBA history. The Pistons held the ball as long as possible to prevent the Lakers from blowing them out. Shot clock anyone?

1960s: Philadelphia Warriors: 169 New York Knicks: 147 (March 2, 1962): Chamberlain drops 100.

1970s: Boston Celtics: 128 Phoenix Suns: 126 (3OT) Game 5 NBA Finals (June 4, 1976): The series was tied 2-2. The Celtics took a huge lead, but lost it. The game featured three overtimes, controversial calls, and strangeness with the game clock. Boston won the game and then the title in Game 6.

1980s: Detroit Pistons: 186 Denver Nuggets: 184 (December 13, 1983): During the NBA’s glory years, the Pistons outscored the Nuggets in the highest scoring affair in history. Twelve players scored in double digits, six scored over 20, and four hit for more than 40. Nearly 30 years later, it remains the highest scoring game in NBA history.

1990s: Chicago Bulls: 90 Utah Jazz: 88 (Game 5 NBA Finals) The Flu Game (June 11, 1997): Michael Jordan had the flu and finished with 38 while playing 44 minutes. Karl Malone disappeared. Bulls win.

2000s: Los Angeles Lakers: 100 Sacramento Kings: 99 (Western Conference Finals Game 4): May 26, 2002: The Lakers trailed by 24 and came back to win on a Robert Horry three-point shot. This series is now marred by revelations that some NBA officials may have been in the tank.

2010s: Boston Celtics: 95 Cleveland Cavaliers: 85 (Eastern Conference Semifinals): May 13, 2010: LeBron Gone! With his crown came nothin’! At this point, LeBron James has no substance and no heart.

Greatest Games of the 1990s: #21-25

Again, these are local Detroit/Michigan games...

21. Lions: 20 Dallas: 17 (September 19, 1994): On a Monday night, the Lions beat the two-time Super Bowl Champion Dallas Cowboys. People went nuts and thought the Lions time had arrived.

22. Bulls: 115 Pistons: 94 (May 27, 1991): The two-time NBA Champion Pistons got old quick. The Bulls swept them in the 1991 Eastern Conference Finals after being whipped by the Bad Boys every year. This game is notable for the controversy following the game. The Pistons walked off the court and did not congratulate the Bulls. The reason? Michael Jordan claimed he was doing the NBA a favor by knocking off the thuggish Pistons. Nowadays, people barely remember Michael.

23. Red Sox: 4 Tigers: 0 (September 18, 1996): In a lousy season for both Clemens and the Tigers, the Rocket came with his A game and whiffed 20. Alan Trammell would retire at the end of the year, Clemens moved on to Toronto and won two Cy Young Awards, and the Tigers finished under .500 for the next 10 years.

24. Spartans: 28 Wolverines: 27 (October 13, 1990): Michigan scored late to make it 28-27 and went for 2. Spartan defender Eddie Brown mugged Desmond Howard, but no call was made. State wins and Michigan loses the #1 ranking.

25. CMU: 24 MSU: 20 (September 12,1992): Just to prove a point, CMU beat MSU for the second year in a row. What a night in Mt. Pleasant that was!

2009 Quotes of the Year

1. “We’re all victims of our gene pool. Someone peed in yours.”

-Walter Bishop (John Noble) from Fringe

2. “I'm in the Batcave learning to tweet.”

-Adam West

3. “Attila liked to hang by the pool when he wasn’t raping and pillaging.”

- Documentary on Attila the Hun

4. "I started to cry and I said, 'I'll never be able to climb up that hill,' And he lifted me up in his strong, gentle arms and said something I will never forget. He said, ‘I‘ll help you if it takes all day. I know you can do it. There is nothing that you can't do.”

- Ted Kennedy Jr at his father’s funeral

5. “I’m the Reverend Jesse Jackson.”

- Jesse Jackson after being misidentified as Al Sharpton on MSNBC

6. "I think he's that good a melodist, but he's a wanker." Bono added that Martin was "obviously a completely dysfunctional character and a cretin, but he happens to be a great melodist and up there with Ray Davies, Noel Gallagher and Paul McCartney."

-Bono on Chris Martin of Coldplay

7. “I never understood how a great man, a nice guy coached the Bad Boys.”

-Charles Barkley on Chuck Daly

8. “Like Kennedy, we failed to give the Cubans air cover!”

-Pat Buchanan on Watergate

9. “There is no I in team, but there is in win.”

-A humble Michael Jordan at his induction into the Basketball Hall of Fame

10. “Kill All The Lawyers!”

- Sandra Day O’Connor at a Shakespeare reading